Acknowledgements

This document was developed by Angie King, Shaun O’Donohue and Donald McPhater. Much of the content is original work by the editorial team, with extracts from the existing SMART Handbooks, (Family and Friends and the Inside Out programme). We are grateful to the authors of the source materials.

Who can copy this document?

This document is copyrighted and must not be replicated in full. You can copy parts if it will benefit SMART Recovery. The following is a summary.

1. Copying this document is restricted to:

• Active UK SMART Recovery trained and approved facilitators.

• Active Champions, under the terms of the UK SMART Recovery partnership scheme.

• People who get written permission from UK SMART Recovery’s Chief Executive.

2. This document must not be used or copied by the staff of any organisation in the course of their professional duties unless part of SMART’s Partnership scheme.

3. This document is not licensed for distribution or use outside of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, the Channel Islands, and Isle of Man.

ProtectedTM

The term “SMART Recovery”, “SMART Recovery 4-point program” and the logo are internationally registered trademarks protected under the Madrid Protocols.

Publisher

UK SMART Recovery.

For more information

The SMART Handbook provides detailed information about the theory behind the programme. This is available for purchase from the website or by calling Central Office.

For further information

Website: www.smartrecovery.org.uk

Email: info@smartrecovery.org.uk

Tel. Central Office 0330 053 6022

UK SMART Recovery

Company Limited by Guarantee (9225444) and a Registered Charity in England and Wales (1160516) and Scotland (SC046247).

Registered office is 10 Queen Street Place, London, EC4R 1BE Under License from: SMART Recovery International
Version: 1. September 2020

Welcome to the SMART Recovery user guide.

This guide contains practical, helpful tools and techniques that can be used in everyday life, for the rest of your life.

Along with SMART Meetings, this guide will give you knowledge and skills to help with your recovery. You will gain confidence and be able to make the best choices for yourself.

Important Information

Not everyone can recover from addiction by reading a book or attending a meeting, even if you do everything suggested.

SMART Recovery meetings and materials are not a substitute for professional help and treatment. The SMART Recovery programme is based on people helping each other. Facilitators help to guide meetings, but they are not therapists or counsellors.

If you are having serious difficulties with alcohol, drugs, or other unsafe addictive behaviour please get professional help from your GP, or phone your local drug and alcohol service as soon as possible.

What is SMART Recovery and how do I use it?

SMART stands for Self-Management And Recovery Training. It is a scientifically recognised programme for people who want to change behaviour that is causing them problems. SMART puts you in charge of your recovery. You discover what works for you.

The SMART programme:

• Is based on science and evidence of what works

• Is practical and focused on solutions

• Gives tools and techniques to change your behaviours from actions that have caused you difficulties

• Has four points designed to help you manage your behaviour and move through your recovery journey and beyond:

1. Building and maintaining motivation

2. Coping with urges

3. Managing your thoughts feeling and behaviours

4. Living a balanced life

SMART is one of many ways to recovery. We encourage you to also connect with other services, clubs and groups in your area.

You decide how long you need to stay with SMART.

At first, coming to SMART meetings may feel very important but, as your recovery becomes stable you may find the need to attend less often. In time, you may even want to give something back and train to become a facilitator yourself.

SMART tools

Tools help you to look at your behaviour and how to challenge the way you think and behave. SMART does not see addiction as a disease, which helps you to make changes you want through your own choice.

When you change behaviours that are causing a problem, your life improves.

SMART’s tools are based on Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), which you may have heard of, and other therapies used by psychologists.

CBT is about the connection between your thoughts, feelings and behaviours.

According to CBT, it is your thoughts and beliefs that will mostly determine how you feel.

Once you have learnt how to use the tools, you can apply them to all sorts of decisions you need to make in life every day.

SMART meetings

• Focus on helping each other (mutual aid) in the goal of recovery

• Don’t use language like ‘addict’ or ‘junkie’ because you are a human being not an addictive behaviour

• Are free to attend, just turn up

• Are strictly confidential, what is said in the SMART meeting stays in the meeting.

• Are always guided by a trained facilitator.

SMART meetings follow a specific format, so everyone gets the chance to contribute and learn.

SMART meeting format

Types of meeting

• Face to face at a local venue.

• Online, advertised on the SMART website.
Access by smartphone, tablet, or laptop.

• For specific groups; LGBT+, women only

• SMART Family and Friends for your loved one’s

• SMART Military for serving personnel and veterans

• Start SMART for under 18’s

• Inside Out for people in the criminal justice system

Getting Started

Labels ‘throw them away’ (if you choose to).

Addict, alcoholic, junkie, smoker, gambler – what do these words have in common?

They are a label describing an addictive behaviour. Labels can have negative effects on your life.

In SMART Recovery, having an addictive behaviour does not make you a bad person or a failure, and the only label we are interested in is ‘what is your name?’

An addictive behaviour can also be described as a ‘learned behaviour’.

How does learned behaviour fit with addictive behaviour?

Anything you learn in your lifetime is stored in your brain; absolutely everything.

OK, right now your brain is thinking of a memory from your childhood.

Our brains help us survive, they can solve complex problems as well as controlling everyday activities like walking and talking.

But, what happens to your brain when a rewarding behaviour or substance is introduced to it?

The answer is, the brain releases ‘feel good’ hormones, you get a feeling of pleasure and reward that is stored in your brain.

For some people, (not everyone) this reward feeling is then imprinted on the brain.

This feeling can become so strong that your brain wants to have it every day. It urges you to chase that feeling and you become stuck in a cycle of behaviour that becomes an addiction.

How do I know if I have an addictive behaviour?

You are the best person to decide if you have a problem. Sometimes your GP might suggest you have an issue after a routine check-up. i.e. blood test results.

Take a look below; have any of these become a problem?

When you drink/gamble/use/ overspend/overeat etc.

Do you experience any of these issues?

• Money worries, debt

• Health problems

• Poor mental health, depression

• Relationships; arguments and breakdown

• Work issues; late, absent, not productive

• Losing friendships

• Trouble with the police

• Spend all day thinking about the behaviour

• Try to hide the behaviour from others

• Trouble stopping even when you want to

• Isolating yourself from others

• Denying having a problem, even when others tell you

If you have ticked two or more, it indicates that your current habits may be an addictive behaviour that is impacting your life.

It is usual to feel worried or hopeless, but SMART can help with your journey of recovery as it treats you as a person who has choices and can make decisions.

The good news

Your wonderful brain has a unique skill that has limitless potential – ‘The ability to learn and store new skills’ Scientists call this, ‘neuro-plasticity’.

So, how to do we tap into our ability to learn to change and store the new skills we want?

By learning new behaviours, which is where SMART’s programme comes in:

• You discover your power of choice, choosing what and how you want to change.

• You find out which tools and methods work for you.

• You create a satisfying and balanced life based on your values and choices.

Making a change

Making changes isn’t easy but it is possible.

Look at the diagram below and decide which stage you are at!

1. I don’t want to change

Change is not easy, sometimes you are not ready… yet.

You may be ready tomorrow, or next week. Your state can change quickly. It is not fixed.

2. Do I want to change?

You can see there is a problem but have not decided what to do.

3. I’m getting ready for change

You have decided to make a change. You can see it will be a good thing to do. Perhaps you have Googled a SMART meeting or spoken to someone.

4. I’m doing something about it.

You attended your first meeting or asked for help. You are using the tools and finding out what works for you. It feels new and exciting.

5. I’m doing all the things I need to do.

You are no longer drinking, using, gambling etc. You keep going, even when it feels boring or hard because you are committed to changing.

6. I’ve made the change

You don’t need to attend meetings to keep you on track. You don’t need to put much energy into your recovery anymore. The change is part of your new life.

The only person who can change your behaviour is you.

• SMART puts you in charge of your recovery journey.

• SMART gives you the tools and confidence to change your behaviour.

• SMART meetings help you connect with others in recovery.

“Are you ready to discover your power of choice and make positive and lasting changes?„

Read on to find out about building and maintaining motivation.

The SMART Recovery Programme

1. Building and maintaining motivation

What is motivation?

Motivation is the drive to change behaviour.

Wanting to change often starts with a desire for suffering, pain, or discomfort to end or be relieved.

It is key to recovery from addictive behaviour. It is what drives you to meet your goals. Without it, you are not likely to change very much.

Building motivation

You may be motivated to change because of the negative effects of your behaviour in drinking or using etc. If your drinking means you get ill or into trouble with the police, you may be motivated to stop.

Another way to make a change is to target something positive.

If your behaviour has impacted your finances, you may be motivated by having more money in your pocket. Then you are building the life that you want to live.

Once you start to change, the suffering, pain and discomfort lessen naturally.

Motivation and your values

The answer to these questions is personal to you.

“ When your actions do not match up to your values you know it, because you experience discomfort.„
“ When you know what is important to you, you can easily identify behaviours that need to change.„

Discover what you think is important in life and you will discover your own motivation. The tools in the Building and Maintaining Motivation section will help with this.

Choosing behaviours consistent with your values helps you take steps toward creating a life that is more fulfilling.

Making a change is one thing, maintaining it is another.

Maintaining motivation

It is difficult to make lasting changes to your behaviour. Your efforts will go far beyond the point at which it is inspiring or fun. This stage is called The Grind.

It starts when the actions needed to make meaningful change become stressful, tiring, and tedious.

“The Grind is also the point at which your efforts toward change really count.„

You can decide to give up because change is too hard, or you can decide to accept it as part of the process. The choice is yours.

“The Grind may not feel very good.„

“ What, does feel good is seeing your efforts pay off and the positive changes in your life.„

Recovery from addiction is a life-long journey. Staying motivated can be difficult at times even though you’ve made the decision to start your recovery journey.

We all want avoid discomfort and recovering from addiction is uncomfortable. Letting go of your embedded patterns is hard work. Trusting the process and believing in the results of a happier, healthier future will help to keep you going.

One of the best ways to maintain motivation is to connect with like-minded people. Attend a SMART meeting, seek the support of your local recovery community, or read about other people’s recovery journeys on the SMART website.

Tools to use for motivation to start or maintain your recovery

Top Tip

Try different tools, until you find the ones that work for you. Everyone is different, what works for your friend may not work for you.

Tools can be used throughout your recovery. One tool may work well at the start, another may work better to help you maintain your recovery. Keep trying them out until you find the right one for you.

1. Cost Benefit Analysis – advantages and disadvantages of addictive behaviour

2. Hierarchy of values – what matters most

3. Priority list – my main concern

4. Change plan worksheet

5. The 3 questions

6. Brainstorming

7. ABC

8. Anger management

9. Relaxation techniques

Cost Benefit Analysis

This tool helps you to look at the positives and negatives of addictive behaviour. Go to P83 for worksheet.

How to use it

If you want to be able to use it again, write in pencil. Alternatively, get the page photocopied, or print one off from the SMART website.

In the left column, list all the things you like about your addiction and on the right, all the problems with it.

Most of the advantages of your addictive behaviour only last for a short time. However, the disadvantages and risks are long-term.

This tool can help you build your motivation to choose or stay in recovery.

Now go to the ‘Stopping’ section and repeat the same process.

When you are thinking about using or drinking, you tend to think only of the short-term effects, which make you feel better in the moment. Using this tool helps you to step back and consider the real impact on your life.

“SMART tools work by getting us to think more positively about negative things. Then you can see a future where change is possible„

Hierarchy of values – what matters most to me

It’s not something many people think about. You may think you just wake up and

• Work, pay bills, get drunk/use/gamble/overeat, watch a movie

• Repeat

• Football/shopping at the weekend

This tool helps you discover what is important in your life. Go to P81 for worksheet.

How to use it

“Write a list titled What I Value Most with your top five priorities in life, putting the most important at the top and so on.„

We don’t usually consider alcohol/drugs/overeating/gambling (the behaviour) as the number one priority in our lives. When we are involved with our addictive behaviours, everything else on the list gets messed up. Everything else we value becomes less important.

It’s like holding up a mirror to yourself, it’s not easy but if you don’t like what you see, you can make changes.

The good news is once you have stopped, you can put ‘stopping’ and ‘recovery’ at the top of this list.

“When you look after your recovery everything else falls into place.„

Keep the list on or near you so you can look at it because when you get an urge or are feeling down, you may not be thinking clearly. Your list can help remind you of all that is important at this time.

Remind yourself that the urge will only last 10-20 minutes, and important things like relationships and your health will last a lifetime.

Some people create reminders, like keeping a photo of your child in your wallet. When you get the urge to buy drink, the photo reminds you of your decision to stay sober.

My priority list. (If you like lists, this tool is perfect for you!)

How to use it

Draw three lines down a piece of paper to create four columns. Label the columns as shown by the example below.

Change Plan Worksheet

Think about the changes you want to make. Go to P82 for worksheet. For ideas see the completed one below.

How to use it

Think about each section and spend time on them.

If you get stuck, think about what advice you would give to a friend in a similar situation.

The changes I want to make are:

I want to be abstinent for a week and visit my family. I want to be sober / I want to eat better

How important is it: that I make this change?
10

How confident am I: that I can make this change
7

The most important reasons why I want to make these changes are:

My health is failing

I want to see my kids

I want to keep my job

I want to keep a good relationship with my ex

The steps I plan to take in changing are:

Read SMART User Guide and go to some SMART meetings online Avoid going past pub or off license

Plan to phone my friend, go for a walk, read a magazine, do a puzzle or quiz when urges get unbearable. Get some exercise to sleep better

Get some healthy food in and try to make a nice meal. Fill in my time with relaxing activities that I enjoy.

The ways other people can help me are:

Person

Mate’s Mum

GP

Possible ways they could help me

Can phone when not feeling good

Can see and ask about getting something to help me sleep

I will know that my plan is working if:

I stay sober, get some sleep and eat better. I make it to work on time. I do not go near the pub. I see the GP.

Some things that could interfere with my plan are:

Seeing a drinking friend and being pressured to go for a couple of beers Starting to drink and use at all

Staying in and getting bored, not doing any exercise or not eating properly Not going to the SMART meeting

An emotional upset

The three questions

These three questions are a simple way to help with motivation.

We often think about what we want but we don’t follow through. This tool helps you to think about what you are doing (your behaviour) and how it is making you feel.

Answering these questions helps you focus on achieving the changes you want to make.

For example:

What do I want? 1. To be abstinent

What am I doing? 2. Getting drunk, using, overspending, overeating

How do I feel? 3. Guilty and depressed

“SMART doesn’t supply answers, but it helps you to think about the right questions to make the changes you want.„

Brainstorming – problem solving

This tool is used to think of ways of solving problems or issues.

It is best used in a group where others in recovery help to generate ideas

How to use it

State the problem, then come up with as many ideas as you can to solve it

Example

Problem: Going to a wedding or celebration where there are free drinks or friends that use drugs recreationally; worried about pressure to drink or use

Possible solutions:

1. Plan a list of substitute drinks.

2. Avoid the area where free drinks may be available on a table or tray.

3. Say you are on antibiotics and can’t partake.

4. Practice asking for a soft drink with a friend.

5. Arrange to arrive late and leave early.

6. Offer to be the designated driver so you cannot drink.

7. Just say you cannot go.

8. Take a friend to keep an eye on you.

9. Arrange to be the entertainment and borrow a DJ rig.

10. Arrange a visit to the dentist and have your teeth cleaned instead.

11. If it gets too much to handle, arrange for a friend to call saying it’s an emergency and you must leave.

ABCDE – logical thinking

Your feelings, actions and the outcomes of any situation are driven by your thoughts; what you believe to be true. This tool helps to change your thoughts and beliefs from illogical to logical

A Activating event: Imagine you are walking past the pub on a sunny day after months of rain. Everyone is outside drinking and enjoying themselves, laughing with their friends and family

B Beliefs: I really want to have a drink. I ought to be able to have a brilliant time like everyone else. I can’t stand it if I am left out

C Consequence: Feeling envy, anger, a massive urge to drink and get totally drunk. I never want to go to past the pub again in case I get an urge to get drunk.

Go to p89 for worksheet.

Now get a CAB! Think of the Consequences of this event:

The Activating event:

Your Beliefs about the event:

Turn each of these into a question and answer it.

D Dispute. Mull over these rational beliefs a few times. Now find out how that makes you feel about the situation from point A.

E Effective new belief. Changing your beliefs about the difficult situation helps you to change how you feel and act.

Example

Event Walking by the pub.

Adversity (What was the single most distressing thing about the event)

I can’t do what they are doing and have a good time

Unhealthy negative emotion

Unhealthy envy leading to extreme anger

A massive urge (9/10) to drink and get wasted like they are

I never want to go past the pub again or see those people in case I get an urge to get drunk

Irrational Beliefs (What is the demand)

I really want to have a drink too and I SHOULD TO be able to have a brilliant time like everyone else

I won’t be able to stand it if I am left out or don’t have alcohol

Rational Beliefs

I really want to have a drink too BUT I don’t have to, to have a brilliant time like everyone else

I don’t like being left out BUT it won’t’ kill me if I am, so I can

stand it. I could just walk past and say Hi to them then crack on walking.

Healthy negative emotion (Annoyance, remorse, sadness, concern, disappointment, sorrow, healthy envy or jealousy)

Healthy level of envy and anger, like a niggle.

Urge assessment: How I want to behave / How I behaved (Act assertively, Deal with problem, Stay abstinent. Rate urge 1-10)

An urge to drink that I can manage (5) and a strong desire not to drink and let the urge pass. I’ll go the pub for a set time period and have a soft drink.

Anger Management

Think about the physical sensations produced by anger and become more aware of our feelings so they lessen in intensity. Tuning into the way your body feels when you are angry often lessens the emotional intensity of it.

Now plan how to tackle this:

• Take some deep breaths, deep and slow breathing helps to reduce tension. The key is to breathe deeply from the abdomen, getting as much fresh air as possible into your lungs.

• Do the ten breath exercise on the next page

• Going for a brisk walk or a run. You could take the dog for a walk if you have one.

• Gentle exercise helps release the pent-up energy so you can look more rationally at the situation making you angry.

• Use all your senses: sight, smell, hearing, touch and taste. Listen to music, imagine yourself in a favourite place; take a bath, use aromatherapy; brew a good cup of tea or coffee.

• Stretch or massage areas of tension, gently massage your neck and scalp.

Relaxation Techniques

Here are a couple of approaches to relaxation. No fancy equipment is needed and you can probably do them

“Anywhere without anyone noticing.„

Count ten breaths

This can be done as a regular thing or when feeling angry. Sit in a comfortable, upright posture

Breathe in and out through your nose. Notice how your chest expands / tummy sticks out at the same time as you are breathing in.

It can be helpful to put one or both hands on your stomach (just below the belly button) to get a feel of this sensation.

• Take three long deep breaths, noticing how this feels.

• Now, let your breath settle to its normal rhythm.

• On the out-breath, silently count ‘one’.

• On the next out-breath, count two, and so on up to ten.

• When you get to ten, go back to one.

If you lose count, you have not failed – just start again at one. Go back to the counting and the physical sensation of your breathing.

Notice any distracting thoughts and go back to the breath counting.

Do this for the time you decided in advance and try not to give up early.

“ This exercise helps you to become present in the moment and learn how to let emotional upsets subside without reacting to them in an unhelpful way.„

Muscle relaxation

Muscle relaxation helps your body to learn how to respond when muscles are tense.

You can do this lying down or in a chair.

Tense each muscle group one at a time, holding it for 10 seconds and then let it relax.

This will help you to feel the muscle group in a tense state and then a relaxed one.

You could start from your head and work slowly to your feet.

Coping with urges and cravings

What are urges?

“Urges start with a thought but can cause physical sensations, for example, hunger. Your brain lets you know you are hungry, and your belly may rumble, or you feel less energetic, time to eat!„
“An urge is different to alcohol or drug withdrawals. Withdrawals are caused by suddenly stopping alcohol or drug use, and must be monitored by a health professional. This is sometimes called a detox.„

If your brain has been hijacked by a substance or behaviour, you might find your brain is busy with urges at first. You may experience a strong pull towards using again. This is completely normal.

For some people urges are very strong, whilst others don’t get them at all.

Never be ashamed of urges, they are common and are simply your brain doing what it is meant to do. For example:

If you are hungry, you want and need to eat.

If you are thirsty, you want and need a drink of water.

If you are lonely (this could be a trigger) you might want to go to the pub.

If you are bored, you might want to gamble.

The brain has a problem to solve because it needs something!

The same goes for being lonely – people are social beings; you need to connect with others. Your brain learns it takes less energy to go to the pub and have a pint in order to connect with others. Then your brain makes this a strong ‘learned behaviour’ which is powerful.

If your brain learns that using alcohol is gives you confidence, or a substance helps you escape negative emotions it will use this mechanism to drive you.

What your brain needs to learn is a new way of solving the problem e.g. how to be confident without alcohol, how to deal with negative feelings without using, how to deal with anxiety without overspending.

Using SMART tools puts you in charge, so you always have a choice; the addictive behaviour or a new healthy choice.

What is a trigger?

“A trigger is an unexpected prompt like going to the shop to buy milk and the chocolate is on offer right at the till! Or a friend calling, a sunny day, a celebration or anniversary, an advert, going past your dealer’s house – you get the idea.„

For example:

“The football is on television and your friend calls. Then the craving thought comes,„

“Quite fancy a pint with my mate then the urge hits. Your brain thinks it’s going for a pint and you are not even in the pub yet. You get a little feeling of satisfaction in your belly or maybe, your heart rate goes up slightly due to the anticipation of going out.„

You have gone from trigger to urge in seconds – your brain has already put out reward signals and you are not even out of the door. How do you challenge this when it happens so fast?

By practising with the SMART tools and strategies.

“SMART tools help you to press the ‘pause’ button in you so you can make a new choice.„

You learn about your triggers and use tools to challenge the cravings.

This reduces the impact of the urge and buys you time to make a healthier choice.

Tools to cope with cravings and urges

Top Tip

Decide on your preferred tool and practice it, so when the cravings or urge strikes you already have a plan in place.

The 3 questions, Brain Storming, ABC’s and the 3 columns have been covered in building and maintaining motivation but are also useful for coping with cravings and urges. If you found them useful, refer back and adapt them for use in this situation or explore some of the new tools. The choice is yours.

1. The 3 Questions (see section 1)

2. Brainstorming (see section 1)

3. Role playing

4. STOP THOUGHT

5. DIB’s

6. ABC’s (See section 1)

7. Three Columns (See section 1)

8. 5 things to consider

9. Urge Log

10. Urge Surf

11. DEADS

12. DISARM

13. HALT the BADS

14. Play the tape forward

15. PIG

Role Playing

Not confident dealing with a situation or an occasion?

Try this, you can role-play to practice a new behaviour in place of an old unwanted behaviour.

You can work through an upcoming event or situation, such as a job interview, wedding or meeting an old friend who still drinks/uses/gambles etc. Best used in a group.

For example:

This scenario involves a wedding: the guest and the host.

STOP THOUGHT, refusal method

Then this tool is for you:

We use this when we cannot get thoughts out of our head, especially when we get urges. 43

Recognise that you are obsessing over an irrational thought. It probably is like that tune you cannot get out of your head.

• ‘STOP!’ say it, yell it, or shout it to yourself in your thinking.

• Imagine a stop sign or no-entry sign in your head.

• If you are going to yell it out, you might first consider where you are. In a Shopping Centre you might get stopped by store security!

• Say this over and over to yourself, until the thought stops going around your head.

• As soon as this thought stops, quickly distract your thinking to something relaxing. Use a tool such as DISARM or think of a short-term goal you have set yourself.

If the thought returns, repeat the STOP THOUGHT over and over until it stops again.

“Sometimes noises, like tapping on a table, can calm thoughts.„

Disputing Irrational Beliefs – questioning your illogical thoughts. Go to P84 for worksheet.

This tool helps you understand what irrational beliefs are and get better at using rational beliefs to question them

What is an Irrational Belief?

A belief that is:

• Not True – it is unrealistic, no evidence to support it

• Doesn’t make sense – it is not logical

• Harmful – it does not help you in the long run.

A Rational Belief

A belief or thought that is:

• True – realistic, there is evidence to support it

• Makes Sense – logical

• Helpful – helps you to get what you want in the long run.

Rational beliefs come from us challenging our irrational ones by questioning them:.

What are the common inaccurate thoughts you have when wanting to drink / use drugs / engage in an addictive activity?

Examples of disputing irrational beliefs:

The three columns

Finding yourself stuck in the humdrum of recovery and needing to stop boredom?

• What do you need to do to keep things going?

• What do you do to learn and grow?

• What do you do just for fun?

How to use it:

“By looking at the overall picture of how you spend your time, you get a clearer picture of any imbalances. It is then obvious what you need to do to achieve a more balanced lifestyle.„

Self-maintenance
The everyday things you need to do: work, shopping, cooking, etc.
Self-development
Activities you do to educate or challenge yourself
Fun
Relaxation and enjoyment with friends and family

Job
Shopping
Paying the bills
Cleaning the house
Looking after the kids Doctors appointments
Training course
Go to church/ temple etc
Language lessons
Watching YouTube
Going to Gym
SMART meetings
Sport
Movies
?
?
?
?

A balanced life is key to recovery.

Five things to keep an eye on

When an urge hits these five questions can help

Then ask ‘how am I doing spiritually, am I feeding my soul’? This could be music or theatre, films, reading books or religion/faith.

Lastly, ’how am I physically’? What am I eating, how much exercise am I getting, how much stress am I under? These thought processes affect your body and brain chemistry.

Urge Log

One way to understand your urges is by recording them in an urge log. It’s a sheet where you record specific information about your urges.

After a few entries, you may notice patterns and similarities.

The log helps you anticipate situations and emotions that may be triggers.

“You also may notice certain thought patterns associated with your urges, which are helpful in self-management and problem solving (Point 3).„

You may find it useful to keep a notebook so you can immediately log an urge before you forget it. Go to p86 for Worksheet.

At first, you may need to write in it many times a day.

“When you identify urges triggered by certain times, places, or situations that you encounter regularly, you can plan ways to avoid them or distract yourself. See the back of the handbook for an urge log worksheet.„

Urge Surfing

“Urges can be described as being similar to a wave. They come in all shapes and sizes and if a big enough wave hits you, it can feel overwhelming and knock you off your feet.„

At SMART you learn to ride the waves as they grow in size, break up and disperse, now grab that board. Surfers have to trust that the waves will eventually get smaller and reach the shore even when the waves feel large and overwhelming.

You can ride the “wave” by using your breath as a kind of surfboard until the urge passes.

Some facts about urges:

• Urges rarely last longer than 30 minutes if you don’t “feed” them with attention, planning to fulfil them, justifying, etc. Urges will pass on their own if we allow them to.

• Suppressing a thought, feeling or sensation ultimately increases it. Fighting urges (even by trying to talk oneself out of them or distracting from them) often makes them bigger.

• When urges grow, it can feel like they are never-ending until you give in to them.

• The mindful understanding of urges is that you can’t get rid of them—you can practice ways to accept them and ride them out without giving in to them.

Purpose of urge surfing

Whatever action you repeat gets stronger. Whatever action you don’t repeat gets weaker.

If you go over and over the urge in your mind, it will likely grow. If you practice urge surfing, then your ability to cope with the urge will increase and improve.

“With urge surfing, you can learn to experience the urges in a new way and “ride them out” until they subside.„

Shoot urges down DEADS

“Here is a tool to help you manage urges better„

D = Deny the urge and refuse to give into it NO MATTER WHAT and delay acting on it. Remind yourself, over and over if necessary, THIS urge will pass in 10-20 minutes.

E = Escape the trigger If you know what is causing the urge, if you are passing a pub, a dealer’s house, a bookies get away from the trigger quickly (RUN AWAY if you have to) and wait for the urge to pass in 10-20 minutes.

A = Avoid the trigger You can keep track of urges using the Urge Log. Urges can occur routinely as part of a daily or weekly pattern If you know you will be in a future situation that is a trigger, PLAN to avoid that situation. Go to P88 for worksheet.

A = Attack the urge. Use a tool. Ask others which they recommend and have had success with. How about DISARM, DIBs, STOP THOUGHT, Urge Surfing or the ABCs?

A = Accept the urge Tell yourself the urge will pass soon. If you do not give in to it, the next urge will be less intense. Urges will become less frequent. Sit down quietly and feel the urge build and watch it fade.

D = Distract with an activity Do something, anything, as we have suggested before in this guide.

S = Substitute the addictive activity Substitute the harmful behaviour for a healthy activity. Substitute an irrational belief (this urge will kill me) with a rational one(this urge is bad but it will not kill me and it will pass). Substitute drinking a bottle of wine with taking your dog for a walk. Substitute having a joint or a line of cocaine with going for a brisk walk or a run.

Destructive Images and Self-talk Awareness and Refusal Method

Your addictive behaviour is only a behaviour and not you.

An urge is only a feeling or a wish that you experience, not you. You are far more than your behaviours or urges.

Some people find it helps to give their urge a name, as if the urge is another being or something outside themselves.

HALT the BADS

HALT: Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired
BADS: Bored, Anxious, Depressed, Stressed

Do any of these states lead to urges? Which one did you have and how did it affect you? What did it make you want to do? How did you deal with it?

Recognising and dealing with these issues can help you to identify and stop some everyday triggers.

Recognising these triggers means you can act before they lead to an urge.

Having a cup of tea, a distraction activity, calling a friend and getting rest can all help with HALT.

Doing something fun that occupies your mind and doing something relaxing or watching an upbeat film can help with BADS.

Try to become more aware of how you are feeling.

Ask yourself whether you are feeling any of these when you have a craving or urge.

HALT the BADS!

If your depression lasts, it’s a good idea to go to your GP and get professional help.

The Problem of Instant Gratification (PIG)

The problem with the PIG is that immediate pleasure seems much more attractive than healthier, delayed rewards.

• Repeating the pattern reinforces the PIG.

• The next urge comes more quickly and more forcefully.

• Any discomfort in life, major and minor, triggers more cravings.

• This results in more urges, which leads to more using.

• Things you once thought of as annoying become huge issues in your mind, giving you a ‘reason’ to use.

• Over time you need more of your addictive behaviour to find relief. You actively look for triggers to have an excuse to use.

“The more you repeat this pattern, the bigger your PIG grows.„

Thousands of people have permanently stopped their addictive behaviours and moved on to live satisfying lives with SMART’s programme. You can too!

Play the tape forward

This thought process helps you get a reality check when cravings and urges threaten to distort your thoughts.

Play the tape forward:

Would that short-term reward really be worth it?

Which tool can you use to beat that urge today?

Who could help you?

Can you go to a SMART meeting and connect with others?

Managing your thoughts, feelings, and behaviours

Most of the time you go through life without thinking about three powerful things that affect you:

• your thoughts

• your feelings

• your behaviour

There is a direct relationship between them. SMART tools help you:

• identify and change unhelpful thinking

• become aware of feelings and manage them

• change behaviour that has become a problem

Managing your thoughts

Taking charge of your thoughts may seem a bit strange at first. After all you can’t help what you think can you?

“Thoughts are like aeroplanes that come and go all day at the airport. You are like air traffic control, in charge of deciding which planes can land and empty their cargo and which can’t.„

You don’t have to give space and time to every thought that comes into your head. Just because you think of using, it doesn’t mean you have to act on it.

“Thoughts are often the start of the urge cycle, e.g. ‘This time it will be different, I will just have one’.„

“Thoughts can act as motivators e.g. ‘Last time I lapsed I ended up in hospital. I don’t want to do that again’.„

When you accept that the only things you can control are your own thoughts, feelings, behaviours, it helps you to stay focused on recovery.

Accepting yourself, others and even life

a) Being down on yourself:

When you have had an addiction, it is all too easy to be down on yourself, others, and life.

‘I’m a complete failure. I can’t do anything right’.
‘My life is one disaster after another’.

These exaggerated and inaccurate beliefs can lead to powerful negative feelings.

In turn, negative feelings drive the cravings to use/drink, overeat etc. but the truth, is you have a choice about what you think.

You can choose a new, more truthful, and balanced belief. Try swapping an old ‘down on yourself’ thought for a new one that is more helpful.

‘I may make mistakes, but I also do good things’
‘My life has it’s ups and downs. Good things happen for me as well as bad.’

Managing thoughts.

Ever done something wrong or made a mistake and then started judging yourself with thoughts like:

‘I’m a complete failure’.
‘There I go, messed up again – I’m useless’.
‘I have no control over myself. What a loser’.

You are no different to everyone else and making mistakes is part of being human.

You may have failed on this occasion, but it doesn’t make you a failure.

And messing up doesn’t make you useless.

‘I may have failed this time, but it doesn’t make me a failure’
‘I messed up, but I am not a waste of space.’

Accepting yourself means being honest about what you have done and accepting it.

Your past behaviours don’t define you. Learning to accept yourself is an important part of the SMART programme and this process takes time and practice.

What about other people?

When you are badly treated, or someone makes a mistake at your expense it is tempting to judge the person.

‘He’s a complete idiot, What a total %$*&!’

Do you notice the exaggerated thinking at work here?

Other people are also likely to fail but it doesn’t make them a failure. They may hurt you, but it doesn’t make them a bad person.

“When you can accept other people’s shortcomings, relationships improve and some of life’s stress lessens.„

Accepting life

You may have judgmental thoughts about life itself.

‘This shouldn’t have happened to me!’
‘My life is absolutely awful. I can’t stand it!’

If you notice yourself thinking like this, take a moment to remember all the good things that have happened in your life.

“Accepting the ups and downs will help you to deal with what comes your way, even though you may not like it.„

Rational versus irrational thinking

Thoughts you have about yourself and the world fall into two categories:

• Rational: thoughts that are true, make sense and are helpful

• Irrational: thoughts that are untrue, don’t make sense and may be harmful

Making demands

‘They should not have done that to me’.
‘He ought to apologise’.
‘I must do better’.

“When you turn your ‘want’ into a ‘demand’ you end up in a negative mindset. Thinking about what you ‘prefer’ instead of what must have’ keeps your thinking true and helpful.„

‘I should be able to drink like everyone else and stop after a couple of beers’.

Versus
‘I would like to be able to drink like everyone else and stop after a couple of beers’.

Exaggerating the bad; words like ‘awful’ ‘terrible’ ‘worst’

‘This is the worst day of my life’
‘That bus ride was terrible’
‘My boss is awful’

Exaggerating the bad may have been an excuse to drink, use or gamble in the past. Learning the skill of thinking more truthfully about life will help you to maintain your recovery.

Coping with frustration: can’t stand it, can’t handle it, can’t deal with it

‘I can’t stand all this aggravation’.
‘I can’t handle the pressure’.
‘I can’t deal with your nagging’.

The truth is although these things are difficult, they are not unbearable. These thoughts are untrue and unhelpful. Could you change to a more accurate and helpful thought?

‘I don’t like all this aggravation, but I will get through it’.
‘I would prefer not to be under pressure, but I can find a way to handle it’.
‘I would prefer you not to nag me’.

All these illogical thoughts feel as though they are true at the time. You may enjoy the drama, but acting on these beliefs can have harmful effects. Press the ‘pause button’ on your recovery ‘remote control’ and ask yourself the following questions:

• Is this belief really true?

• If I act on this belief will it help or hinder my recovery?

• What is a more balanced and truthful belief about this situation?

Managing your feelings

One answer is to look beyond the immediate feeling to your thoughts. Changing what you think will alter the way you feel.

You can make yourself a cup of tea or go for a walk, which is different to how you would normally act and this change of behaviour changes your feelings.

But your new behaviour must be something realistic and achievable.

Don’t plan to run a marathon next time you feel overwhelmed by the need to drink or use. Start with simple things for best results.

Feelings are a normal response to life. Developing the skill to become more aware means you can identify and get used to them.

In early recovery feelings can become intense. You can wonder where all these feelings come from? This is a natural process.

Intense positive feelings can be just as risky as the negative ones. They can lead you back to the behaviour you want to change.

“E.G. you get a promotion at work. You feel elated and want to celebrate. This can lead to going back to your addictive behaviour. Or it can mean using another substance which lowers your inhibitions, and before you know it you end up using.„

SMART helps you step back for a moment, identify your feelings, and decide how to react.

Managing your behaviour

Your actions are as important as your thoughts and feelings.

If you don’t change the things you do, where you go, who you see, you can put yourself in a very risky situation.

‘I will still hang out with my mates even if they are still using’.

Ask yourself

‘Is this a good idea. Will it get me to my goal’?

SMART doesn’t give you all the answers or replace professional help. It does give you tools to find them for yourself. SMART meetings are a useful way of finding out about other people’s experiences.

Sometimes apparently unrelated decisions can lead you to an unsafe place. E.g. deciding to walk home from work on a nice evening ‘because it’s healthy’, then choosing a route that takes you past your favourite pub, your dealers house, a betting shop etc.

SMART helps you to become aware that you have a choice. Just because you feel bad does not mean you have to stay that way. You can do something about it.

Tools for managing thoughts, feelings and behaviours

Top Tip

SMART can’t give you all the answers, but it helps you to ask the right questions, so you keep moving on in your recovery.

1. The 3 Questions

2. Brainstorming

3. Role Playing

4. STOP THOUGHT

5. DIB’s

6. ABC’s

7. Three Columns

8. 5 Things to Consider

9. Change Vocab

10. The 3 Musts

11. Hula hoop

Change your vocabulary – your words matter

You can change your feelings and behaviours by changing the words you use in your thinking. The difference that changing just one word makes might surprise you.

Instead of saying or thinking: | Say or think:
Must or should | Really want/prefer/choose to
Can’t | Choose not to
Awful | Not great/bad/undesirable
You should not do that | I would prefer you not to do that
You are a bad person | I don’t like your behaviour
Everything is terrible | Things are not the way I want them to be
I am so depressed | I feel sad
I am really angry | I feel annoyed
I am a complete failure | I made a mistake

The three ‘musts’

These are ‘I must’ ‘They must’ or ‘Life must’ and they can all be controlled using the ABC tool.

If you are feeling one of these unhealthy negative emotions, it may point to the specific demand in your thinking.

1. ‘I must’ creates anxiety: when we make an irrational demand of ourselves and this demand is not met. Then we want to use our addictive behaviour to calm down, avoid or withdraw from the problem.

2. ‘They must’ creates unhealthy anger/rage: when we make irrational demands about what other people must do. Then we may want to use our addictive behaviour or become aggressive in order to distract ourselves and make the feeling go away.

3. ‘Life must’ creates self-pity: when we make the irrational demand that ‘Life must be better for me, life should be fairer’ we feel powerless and full of self-pity. Then we may want to use our addictive behaviour to escape the powerful negative emotions these words have caused.

The hula hoop

Imagine that you have one around you right now.

It magically hovers around your waist all the time.

Now imagine that everyone else has one around them too.

“So often, we spend time and energy on things that we can’t control and then we get mad at ourselves for failing to do what was never possible in the first place because it was not within our control.„

Think of the hula hoop as your very own sorting tool for separating the things you can and cannot control.

“In other words, if it is in your hula hoop, you can probably control it. If it is out of your hula hoop, you cannot control it and all efforts to do so are wasted.„

What is IN your hula hoop?

• Your body

• Your thoughts

• Your actions/behaviour

• Your opinions

• Your values

• Your dreams

• Your wishes

What is OUT of your hula hoop?

• EVERYTHING ELSE!

• other people

• other people’s thoughts

• other people’s actions

• the weather

• etc, etc., etc.

What is YOURS is in your hula hoop and those are really the only things you can control. Everything that is not yours belongs outside the hula hoop.

Now, this may sound simple, but you would be amazed at how often you find yourself in someone else’s hula hoop.

Imagine that for a minute. Picture yourself merrily hula-ing away with your own hoop.

Then picture yourself hula-ing two hoops - “ahh!!” you may say, “I can hula two hoops” and you may be right.

But can you hula two hoops WITH ANOTHER PERSON IN ONE OF THEM?

Living a balanced life

Living a balanced life - what on earth does this mean? You may feel like the only thing that is balanced is the number of bottles or gambling losses you try to hide away from people.

What is a balanced life?

Wellbeing – ‘never underestimate the benefits of looking after yourself’

Eat well – If you are new to recovery, your body will need a variety of good foods to repair itself. You can have fun cooking from scratch and you will be busier looking after your diet so less time to think about old behaviours.

Exercise –There is a mountain of research on the benefits of exercise. It helps with improved mood, fights off depression, reduces the risk of type 2 diabetes and heart disease, keeps your coordination sharp and gives routine to the day. It also triggers the reward mechanisms in the brain and results in a ‘feel good’ factor without being so damaging.

Sleep –Getting back to a good sleeping pattern takes time. The main reason you find sleep difficult in the early days is because your brain needs to learn to function without substances or behaviours it was used to. This takes time.

It’s a myth that you need go to bed at the same time each night. Sleeping is a free recovery activity, which also reduces anxiety and depression.

Connection – human beings are social; our brains need connections with other people. In a SMART meeting someone once said,

‘I don’t know anyone who is sober! How am I meant to find sober friends?’

The facilitator smiled and said,

‘Take a look around you, you are surrounded by sober friends’.

The connections you make in a recovery group, or local health class are powerful. It’s how you connect with like-minded people. If you are busy living and having fun with friends, there is less time to think about addiction.

Giving back - Finding purpose to your life means you give back to society, and gain self-respect.

Giving back boosts the wellbeing chemicals in your brain. Even just walking the neighbor’s dog is beneficial.

Volunteering can give you new skills, helps you connect with others and fills up your day. You may be able to take courses or get qualifications to help you get into paid work.

Once you have reached a stable place in your recovery, you may want to volunteer for SMART Recovery.

Creativity – everyone has some sort of creative activity they enjoy, often addiction interfered with it. Now is the time to reclaim yours or find a new one. Search online for free groups to join or, do it the old-fashioned way and get a book out of the library. A creative interest fills your time with a positive activity, helps you meet new people and is rewarding.

Mindfulness – When you find recovery, unexpected things can happen. You may start crying at a film or some not so good memories may resurface.

Your mind may start to feel very uncomfortable in general.

This is normal. your mind is trying to process emotions or trauma now it is not occupied with addiction.

If you are feeling panicky or distressed with anxiety or other symptoms, please get in touch with your GP.

Mindfulness is a useful way of improving your mental health. It focusses on being present, enjoying today, being self-aware and letting go of things you cannot control.

Having purpose, having fun, and looking after your wellbeing all have many long-term benefits.

Living a balanced life is a key part of your recovery journey, don’t underestimate it.

You will be too busy living your life to worry about falling back into addictive behaviour.

Top Tip don’t make your recovery journey complicated. Look at the tools in the SMART programme and map out where your life is unbalanced. Then have fun filling those gaps. Life is for living, enjoy the recovery journey. Your choices are limitless.

Tools for living a balanced life

1. Priority List

2. Change Plan Worksheet

3. The 3 Questions

4. Brainstorming

5. Three Column Technique

6. 5 Things to Consider

7. Anger Management

8. Relaxation Techniques

9. Lifestyle Pie

10. Vitally Absorbing Creative Interest

Lifestyle Balance Pie

Use the Lifestyle Balance Pie to represent the different areas in your life.

5. Now ask yourself:

– Are my true values and priorities reflected here?

– Based on what I see, am I living a balanced life?

– Am I involved in too many activities? Is there too much on my plate?

– How much of my time is spent caring for others? For myself?

– What area(s) needs more attention? What needs less attention?

– Is there a dream or desire that I’d like to focus on?

To move yourself toward a more balanced life, give more time to the areas that show gaps.

When doing so, be sure to focus on the whole picture of your life, not just specific areas.

Creating a new life for yourself with a variety of things to explore and enjoy is an important part of recovery.

Vital absorbing creative interest (VACI) - hobbies and activities

Top Tip creating an enjoyable life with creativity, purpose and meaning is a powerful way to help prevent relapse.

Your creativity needs an outlet. Before your behaviour became a problem there were activities you enjoyed and others you wanted to try.

Now you can bring them back into your life and explore new ones to create a fulfilling life and support your recovery long term.

“A creative interest gives simple pleasure and restores the fun and enjoyment that life has to offer.„

First, look at the advantage’s column on your Cost Benefit Analysis.

Did you enjoy the buzz? Did you like being able to just check out for a bit? Was it the taste or the social aspect? Believe it or not, each of these benefits is a key to finding a new interest.

If you enjoyed the buzz, then look at things you could do to get a real buzz out of life.

The reward will be greater, and you will remember it in the morning and for years to come. Figure out what would give you a buzz and take it on.

• ride a roller coaster, climb a hill or mountain

• taking up running or competitive sport

• sky dive or ride a motorcycle

• join a drama club or band and perform on stage

If using or gambling allowed you to ‘check out’ for a bit, maybe looking at some ways of being away from the world can help you restore your energy.

• Take a walk by yourself on the beach or in the forest.

• Go on a day trip, go fishing, and be alone with yourself.

• A bike ride is a great way to be alone with nature.

• What about gardening, crafts, drawing, painting, photography, sculpture, creative writing, singing in a choir or with a band?

Keep your new interest balanced so you don’t replace one addictive behaviour with another.

If you used alcohol or drugs to feel comfortable in social situations, you might challenge yourself to go to a social event and be as friendly and bubbly as you were when you were using.

Now is the time to take your life back and make some of these things happen.

Variety is the spice of life. Find interests you enjoy and keep looking for more.

Life is full of amazing and things to learn and do.

Worksheets

Hierarchy of Values

Change-Plan worksheet

Cost-Benefit Analysis

Disputing Irrational Beliefs

Goal Setting

Urge Log

Lifestyle Balance Pie

Weekly Planner

ABC

UK SMART Recovery

Central Office

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Tel: 0330 053 6022

Business hours Mon – Fri 9.30 – 4.00

Email: info@smartrecovery.org.uk

Website: www.smartrecovery.org.uk

Training site: https://training.smartrecovery.org.uk/

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Registered Charity in England and Wales (1160516) and Scotland (SC046247).

Registered office is 10 Queen Street Place, London, EC4R 1BE

UK SMART Recovery delivers the SMART programme under license from SMART Recovery International which owns the trademarks and intellectual property; not to be used without permission.

Notes:

References.

Dr Jim Taylor HuffPost. 2021. The Motivation Matrix: How To Create The Change You Say You Want. [online] Available at:

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/motivation_b_1179582

(Accessed March 2021).

Dr Josh King, Center for Motivation & Change. 2021. Let values motivate you to change. [online] Available at:

https://motivationandchange.com/let-values-motivate-you-to-change/. (Accessed March 2021)

Dr Jim Taylor, Psychology Today 2021. Personal growth motivation: The drive to change [online] Available at:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/the-power-prime/201201/personal-growth-motivation-the-drive-change

(Accessed March 2021)

Dr Jim Taylor, DrJimTaylor.com 2021. Personal Growth motivation: The drive to change [online] Available at:

https://www.drjimtaylor.com/4.0/personal-growth-motivation-the-drive-to-change.

(Accessed March 2021)

Chris Lang, Journey Pure at the River 2021. Staying motivated in Recovery. [online] Available at:

https://journeypureriver.com/staying-motivated-in-recovery/

(Accessed March 2021)